This is a video of the nightly dinner ritual at our house. When we all eat dinner together, we say prayer before we eat. Every night, K insists that she needs her own prayer with either myself or Mr. Smoochiefrog. It's always the same thing, and utterly hysterical. See for yourself...
Don't ask me why spiders and their getting squished has to be mentioned. Only in the mind of a three year old. :)
Kellan over at OnTheUpside has posted a great post today that reminded me of a story I haven't shared with you guys yet.
Last year when I sent B back to public school after a failed attempt at homeschooling, he became fairly active in the school chorus.
Toward the middle of the year, they started staying afterschool for additional practices to prepare for a festival they were singing in.
The first day after one of the said afterschool practices, B came home about an hour later than normal.
Me: "Where have you been? You should have been home an hour ago!"
B: "We had chorus practice."
Me: "Well why didn't you call me? You have a cell phone."
B: "I'm not allowed to use it in school." It didn't occur to him to step outside. Duh.
Me: "Well they have phones at the school. Why didn't you use one of them?"
B: "I don't know how to use them!"
Me: WTH???? "What do you mean you don't know how to use the phone?"
B: "Well, the ones they have in the classrooms are all weird looking and they don't have buttons. They just have a round disc on them with lots of little holes in the disc."
After I finally stopped laughing, I went on to explain to the poor child about rotary phones.
And then I shocked him even more when I told him about cooking before microwaves.
I wonder what things he'll have to explain to his children. :)
Anyone who really knows me knows that I don't drive well in the rain.
Driving in the rain in the dark? Forget about it! You may as well ask a blind person to drive then.
So tonight as we're leaving the dance studio, I'm informed that a storm is heading our way.
We rush to the car and zoom to grab M some food and head home.
As we're merging onto the highway, lightening starts flashing in the sky.
Hoping to outrun the storm, I put the pedel to the metal and drive as fast as I'm willing to go...70. (Yeah I'm old. I drive a minivan too, get over it.)
As we're taking our exit, sprinkles start hitting the windshield and M & I start praying.
Me: "Lord, please just hold off for a bit. Let us get home safely before you send the rain."
M: "God, please wait. If it rains mommy can't drive and we're toast." Bless her heart. :)
We make it to the house with no rain at all. We unload the van, K was asleep the whole way home, and the girls start getting ready for bed.
As I finish kissing K good-night, I stand up and hear the sound of rain hitting the roof. Hard. I turn to M who is getting her jammies and I say:
"Do you hear that?"
"Yeah."
"It's raining, hard. God listened and held the rain off until we were safe at home."
"He answered our prayers!"
He sure did baby, He sure did. :)
We're eating dinner last night and having a hard time getting K to eat anything.
We were having Cashew Chicken (a Wanchai Ferry kit) that I added veggies to and turned it into a REALLY yummy dish.
K refused to eat anything. Not the chicken, not the rice, not the trees (broccoli) or bean sprouts, nothing!
I decided to use psychology on her and started playing up the dish.
"This is so yummy, K! Really yummy."
"It's sweet and tastes like candy."
"Oh yum, this meat is so sweet."
"Isn't it sweet guys?"
M & B nod in agreement, mouths too full to speak.
I turn to Mr. Smoochiefrog
"How about your meat daddy? Is your meat sweet?"
I knew the MINUTE I said it he would take it wrong.
He nodded and then this look passed over his face.
He couldn't stop laughing for at least 10 minutes.
Jerk.
Last week I'm at the new ghetto Staples (labeled as such due to it being a new building yet still in the ghetto where we used to live) buying some school supplies (9¢ filler paper-um, hello!) and I've just got K with me (M was at dance camp, B at home). We're cruising through the store quickly b/c at this point I've got tons more errands to run.
I scurry into the check-out line with my paper, getting in front of a group of mature adults squawking like wet hens at each other. Something about their mother's brother's auntie's son being in 8th grade now...whatever, I totally didn't care.
I'm digging 50¢ out of my change purse when all of a sudden I hear K beside me yell:
"Hey, you! Stop talking!"
Oh, no she didn't!
O.M.G. Oh, yes she did!
I'm all like "K, that's not nice!" when the lady behind me says:
"I'm sorry, was I offending you? Am I talking too loud?" She's laughing as she says this BTW.
So what does K do? She answers her:
"Um, yes!"
*Insert title of post here*
This is what I have to deal with when she's not doing behaving like this.
"Let your sister out of the dryer right now!"
"Come on guys, lets get in the bath."
K talking to her tortilla chips as she dunked them into the salsa.
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P.S. If you haven't heard about my bloggy birthday celebration week, check out this post for details!
Me: Crap.
D: What?
Me: There's not enough money for dinner tomorrow (we're planning on eating out)
D: So where are we going to get more money?
Me: I've got it, don't worry about it.
D: What are you going to do?
Me: I'm going to go stand on the street corner.
D: Um, can I get on the computer while you're gone?
After K's bath last night:
Me: Come on K, let's go downstairs
K: You pick me up?
Me: I can't K, I'm carrying something. Come on, you're a big girl
K: I not a big girl! Pick me up!
Me: Come on K, let's go
K: I can't. My batteries are all runned out!
Think I can use that excuse the next time I don't want to do something?
I've been working on teaching K to use I instead of me when she refers to herself. I realized how I sound when the following exchange took place:
K: (comes running from the stairway) "Me has p@nties." (referring to shorts)
Me: "You have shorts on now, great!"
K: "Me going to swing!"
Me: "I"
K: "Me going out!"
Me: "I"
K: "No, me going out!"
Me: "You're not going out until you say I"
K: (all exasperated) "IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Wow! Pimp slapped by a 2 year old! Word!
